Memory’s Wake- Chapter 2

There’s a lot of chaos in Chapter One. Want to start finding out what’s going on? Chapter Two will give you some answers…

Memory’s Wake – Chapter Two

Earlier.

Why has it become so hard just to keep my mind on a simple book? Focus, Eloryn ordered herself. Her eyes skimmed over words without absorbing any meaning. She pinched her forehead and flicked back a page, trying to find the last information she’d actually retained from The Principles and History of Infantry Warfare. Alward no doubt had his reasons for making this dull book part of her syllabus but she couldn’t see how it would ever be much use to her, either for her teaching or in practice. If she was learning things she couldn’t share with her own students, she’d prefer to be studying magic.

Learning used to be easy. As a child, Eloryn already knew everything Alward taught the farmers’ children. She went to classes with them anyway, enjoying being with the other students. They stopped coming at age ten, schooled enough for their lives tending fields. She became a teacher herself after that while her own education continued. Now at sixteen, teaching felt repetitive, and she rarely saw anyone her own age. Apart from her small clutch of young students she rarely saw anyone at all. They lived alone, just herself and Alward, here in the fortified old monastery high in the wooded hills, set apart even from the tiny rural hamlet; a place where no one might recognize Alward, or herself, for who they really were. A place they could be safe.

Eloryn brushed against the pink flowers that spilt over the garden wall where she sat. They released a syrupy fragrance and she breathed it deeply, hoping to quell the unnamed ache in her chest.

“Riddip.”

Grateful for a distraction, Eloryn smiled to the speckled frog who hopped up onto her knee. “Kiss you? Why do you want me to kiss you?”

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3 Comments

  1. Jaipal
    27 June 11, 2:00pm

    Hi Selina,

    Chapter two gives a bit more detail about the characters, i.e. the flashback scene and provides more questions than answers. The idea of a girl with no memory is a good gimmick to make the readers explore the world.

    However, the characters are just not as interesting as some other fantasy characters, e.g. Sabriel (Garth Nix), Zarvora (Sean McMullen), Garrett (Glen Cook), etc. Then again, it is just an excerpt of the chapter so I might be missing stuff.

    The idea of using memory is good, but might make more sense if you use a name that means memory but is in a different language (i.e. elvish, french or something). However, might be too late as I think your book is already in press right?

    Anyway, might give it a read to see how the story/world develops. Congratulations of the book.

    • Selina
      27 June 11, 4:03pm

      Thanks for reading and for the feedback. What do you think it is that made the characters you listed interesting and memorable?

  2. 05 July 11, 8:04am

    Love it! I am curious about her relationship with Alward. He’s obviously older than her. Is he a father figure? Or something different? I like the direction the story seems to be going and this brief look at her background to tell us more about her.

    This is a genre I have always enjoyed reading. Looking forward to reading more!

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